Great White Snark: Not gonna let you ruin my day.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Not gonna let you ruin my day.

Taken today at Cocoa Beach. =D

Every year for my birthday, my Mom and I usually go to the beach for a day. We don't stay overnight or anything--we just like to go and wander around the shops, get some sun, take a walk on the beach, that kind of thing.

Well, this year's been a little crazy so between all the weddings, my work schedule, her schedule, and life in general, we never made it over there. One day about two weeks ago, she's like, "Let's just pick a day. You ask off for work, I'll clear my schedule, and we'll go to the beach." I was like, "OKAY!" So I did (luckily) get the day off work, and "beach day" has literally been the highlight of my life since. I didn't sleep a wink last night because I was so excited. Nothing gets me excited like the beach. Not even hot guys. Although, if I ever legitimately see a hot guy who's not famous or fictional, he might beat out the beach.


Today was beach day. SO EXCITED. And we really did have a lovely time, but I need to rant for a minute about THIS B***H.

Allow me to set the scene: we're about 30-50 yards away from Ron Jon's Surf Shop. Those of you who've been to Cocoa Beach know this is the hub of all tourist activity (big surf shop, lots of food, free beach parking, close beach access, etc.). Mom and I decide we want to check out the Cocoa Beach Pier first, neither of us having been. It's about 30-40 yards the other way; we had missed the turnoff for it. So we needed to make a u-turn, but A1A (which is a massive road that runs along pretty much the entire coastline and is THE MAIN/ONLY ROAD through Cocoa.) is a one way street. We get in the turn lane and turn onto one of the many residential streets in that area. The first house on our side has a circular drive (made of dirt, not paved btw) so we're like, "Oh, this is perfect, we'll just turn around and go out the other way." So we drive around and pull up behind a car that's also waiting to turn out.

I drew you a picture so you understand:

The blue line shows what we drove. So, anyway, we're there behind this chick and she backs up, nearly hits my Mom, whips around (yelling the whole time and waving her arms) and pulls up next to us and rolls down her window, still yelling. My Mom rolled down her window. Looking back, this was a not-so-good idea. I mean, I probably wouldn't have done it. I would've just kept going forward. Anyway, she rolls down her window and THIS PSYCHO WOMAN WITH A STARFISH UP HER ASS is like, "WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT??? WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!?"
And Mom's like, "Um, making a u-turn?"
Mom started rolling up her window about halfway through this tirade, THANK GOD, and we just pulled up to where she'd been. She then sped off, only just missing the giant garbage truck, to God-knows-where, since it was a dead-end street. I'm assuming in order to get back to where she was, she probably had to turn around. PROBABLY IN SOMEONE'S DRIVEWAY.

Okay, SERIOUSLY?? I'm terribly sorry for driving IN YOUR DRIVEWAY. Also, you live in the middle of a tourist trap on a one-way street. Did you really think that no one would use your driveway as a turnaround? I mean, if I lived a stone's throw away from Disney and had a circular drive, I'd pretty much resign myself to the fact that people would be there ALL THE TIME, using it for parking, pictures, whatever. If you're gonna live somewhere like that, either resolve to not care or, and here's a novel idea, PUT UP A SIGN. Or a traffic cone, or rope or something. I mean, I know that's a pain in the ass when you live there, but you're a pain in the ass and you live there. And it would've been one thing if my Mom had been peeling around it going 60. If you know my Mom, you know she drives a solid 35mph pretty much all the time--on the main roads. We were going MAYBE 5mph. If we'd been popping wheelies (in my Mom's toaster Scion, lol) and driving all over your lawn, then I'd understand you being upset. But we weren't. And it's not even illegal. I looked it up as soon as we got home. It's not trespassing and it's not against the law (verbal assault and reckless driving are, though, btw).

Like I said: I get being upset. Mom and I were talking later and given the layout of the road and all, this is obviously not the first time someone's used her drive as a turnaround. And I know that's probably annoying. But again. Even if there is another way to get around
a) we're from out of town, like 90% of Cocoa's population, and don't know where it is
b) there was a giant garbage truck blocking all the other driveways as well as the rest of the road! Where else were we supposed to go???

Ugh. Just like, some people.

Anyway, that's my story of the B***h at the Beach. Apart from that, we had a stellar day. It was gorgeous--warm, not a cloud in the sky, a light breeze to keep us from feeling too hot, and the ocean. I bought a cute pair of sandals, swam in the ocean with some pelicans, got a little was glorious.


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