Great White Snark: Lazy.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010


No, I don't wear stuff like that to bed, either.
But I did stay in all day today. I kind of got dressed. Sort of. No makeup. Didn't get in my car.

It was highly boring.

I hate days like this except for when I'm sick. Today, the carpets were cleaned and my Mom had to get her flat tire fixed, so I stayed here while the guy did the carpets. What a pain in the ass, by the way. Having to move all your furniture so the carpets can be cleaned. NOT COOL.


Also, resolving debt and starting a diet during the same week? I don't recommend it.

I've filed 6 job applications. I've pretty much said on there that yes, I have loads of retail experience and I'm willing to work forever during the summer, but once school starts I'll probably screw them over. Either I'll get hired by someone or I won't. I hope I do, just because if I don't have to work I fear there will be many more jammy-clad do-nothing days in my future.

That isn't HEALTHY.

Luckily I'm going out with Bethany tomorrow. I pretty much can't wait.

I promise I'm not actually feeling as mopey as this post sounds.

Also, I'm in love.

I'm setting up a Paypal account so that friends can donate money to my Buy Bixby Fund when they're feeling generous for Christmas and my birthday. Yes. I would like a cream-colored French Bulldog (female) who I will name Bixby and call "Bix," like the awesome dinosaur in Dinotopia.


I've just remembered why I started writing in the first place!

An excellent and most perceptive friend of mine gave me this book for Christmas. I started to read it and then school took over my life and I was too busy reading nonsense like Caleb Williams to finish. I picked it up (and finished!) it yesterday.

If you are intrigued by the character of Irene Adler ("A Scandal in Bohemia" and cause of the famous quote/opening line, "To Sherlock Holmes, she is always the Woman."), then this Holmes pastiche would be RIGHT up your alley. I loved Douglas's descriptions and characterisation Irene. She felt really spot-on, like if Doyle (Doily) had taken more time and interest in, y'know, WOMEN, then he probably would've written her this way. Douglas's Adler is vibrant, flamboyant, fearless and painfully clever. She plays upon the opera singer aspect (which is ACD's fault), and Irene's bohemian lifestyle. She just seems like a really cool chick.

Not so cool is Good Night, Mr. Holmes's narrator, Penelope Huxleigh, who I feel is a contrived female version of Watson. She even has a moustache. I'm so kidding. But she is very much the Watson to Irene's Holmes, and I guess I just found it bothersome. Thankfully, she's original enough that I didn't get a Mary-Sue feeling from her (THANK GOD), but she was a terribly uninteresting narrator, which is problematic since you're seeing the story unfold from HER perspective.

Also. If you want more Holmes and Watson, don't bother. I think they're in an impressive four or five chapters total (out of 35 + epilogue).

What's neat about this story is it's a grand and elaborate set up for the "Scandal in Bohemia" case. That one is one of my favorites (mostly, admittedly, because of The Woman), so it was really neat the way Douglas creates a whole story line (or two or three or five) to reach that penultimate moment when Adler, in disguise and following Holmes, yells goodnight to him. That was quite clever.

OH ALSO. She mentions Bram Stoker and Oscar Wilde is kind of a major character.<3333
The way she describes him is PERFECT. Observe!
"You pour [tea] with the rhythm of a villanelle," said a deep, musical voice at my elbow. My elbow! I looked down to find a large young man half-reclining on the carpet, gazing up at me like a spaniel through wings of long brown hair.
"I beg your pardon?" said I.
"And well you should for wasting the poetry of your pouring on this callow mob. You should pour only for a chosen, appreciative few."
"Indeed." As a parson's daughter I had found that word an adequate response to almost any situation.
"Quite right to keep your own counsel, prim nymph of the afternoon libation, as utterly, utterly cool as a marble chessboard, mute as a concealed pain."
"Would you like a cup of tea, is that it?"
Long pale hands fanned into ten eloquently separate fingers--an overblown flower losing its petals. Everything about my admirer drooped--his shoulder-length hair, his soft velvet tie, the green carnation in his lapel and most of all, his expression.
"I seek ambrosia," he whispered.
"I a very sorry. I'm not serving any of that. Perhaps the punch table--"
"Cruel spite of ancient rites. I withdraw, but my admiration remains."
With that, the odd young an rose--which took some time as he, like Redbeard, towered over six feet when standing--and ebbed into the murmuring clusters.

DROOPY! And mad props for the green carnation reference.

So, overall. Interesting? Yes. Do you need to be a Holmes fanatic to get it? Decidedly not. A story about Sherlock Holmes? Not in the least.

Overall, I'd give it like, 4 stars. Five perhaps, except that I was deluded into thinking it was a Sherlock Holmes story. It's not. Apart from that though, it's still a really quick-paced and interesting read.

Yay! Now I feel like I accomplished something! Jammies and all! Thank you, blogging, for giving me a false sense of purpose.

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